Sunday, September 27, 2009

Wedding Rings

As I mentioned in a couple of previous posts, I am committed to forming a new habit of shining my kitchen sink every night before bed. It really does make me feel good to know that this one thing is done, and done well, every day. Whatever else is a disaster in the house, I know that nothing is piling up in the sink. It is a relief from the sometimes burdensome task of keeping house. So this week, I am adding another goal. This week I am going to take the time to shine our wedding rings.

I feel so blessed to be married to my best friend. Sometimes it feels like we've been together always. In some ways we have, because we married young and all of our major experiences are with each other. All of our greatest joys and sorrows have been shared, and it is a comfort to think that those of the future will be as well, if God allows. At other times, it feels like we just said our vows days ago.

I've been thinking about marriage a lot because we attended two special weddings this weekend. On Friday night, our sister Christina married Brady Bruton in a wonderful and worshipful celebration of God's grace and timing. We are so proud of Christina, who has always been an example of purity, joy, and servant-heartedness. And we are proud to welcome our brother Brady to the family. He is a godly and humble man, greatly gifted by the Lord in music and in working with his hands. We are so thankful! And last night my friend, Heather married Drew Miller at a vineyard in College Station (some pictures are posted here)--it was wonderful to see her radiance and joy and his. They were altogether beautiful. What a celebration! Heather carried a little Bible that has been carried by thirty previous brides in her family!

I may talk in future posts about some of the thoughts I've been thinking about marriage and wedding vows, but tonight I just keep thinking about the rings. Amber said Friday night that it always takes a while to get used to the sight of a man's hand with a new wedding ring. Maybe it's because women are more likely to wear rings and other jewelry whether they are married or not, or because a bride wears an engagement ring for a while (usually!) before she adds the band. But I love the look of a groom's hand with a fresh wedding band. It's a lot like how I imagine the state of his heart to be at the beginning of marriage--it shows up well, is not tarnished or scratched by the daily wear and tear of life and living it, and he wears it slightly awkwardly in his new role. Do not imagine that I think it's a shame when the wedding ring (or the hear) starts to show the wear. On the contrary, I love that too. I have never been tempted to replace Jon's wedding ring, even though he wears it in hard work every day. It is worn and scratched and it becomes more obvious all the time that I didn't spend a great deal on it to begin with. But he wears it so comfortably now, not like the new husband who is wondering what to do next, but like the husband who has already worked to feed his family and has held his wife's hand through deep valleys of sorrow and has guided her in dances of joy.

I want to shine our wedding rings to help us remember what it felt like to be so fresh in our marriage, to wash off some of the inevitable smugness and celebrate how much we still have to learn. But I won't mind when they lose their sparkle again to the comfortable wear of just living together, because I love living with him.